What Kind of Parent Are You? The 5 Parenting Styles and Their Effects on Your Child’s Personality, Behavior, and Happiness
Parenting is one of the most important and challenging roles in life. The way you raise your child can have a lasting impact on their personality, behavior, health, and happiness. But how do you know what kind of parent you are and what kind of parent you want to be? And how do different parenting styles affect your child’s development and well-being?
Psychologists have identified five main parenting styles based on two dimensions: warmth and control. Warmth refers to how responsive, supportive, and affectionate you are toward your child. Control refers to how demanding, strict, and consistent you are with your rules and expectations. Depending on how high or low your score on these dimensions, you may fall into one of these five categories:
- Authoritative
- Authoritarian
- Permissive
- Uninvolved
- Attachment
Each parenting style has its own advantages and disadvantages, and each one can influence your child’s outcomes in different ways. Let’s take a look at each style and see how they affect your child’s life.
Authoritative Parenting
Authoritative parents are high on both warmth and control. They set clear and reasonable boundaries for their children, but they also respect their opinions and feelings. They communicate openly and honestly with their children, and they use positive reinforcement and guidance rather than harsh punishment. They encourage their children to be independent, responsible, and confident.
Authoritative parenting is considered to be the most effective and beneficial parenting style for children. Research has shown that children raised by authoritative parents tend to have higher self-esteem, academic achievement, social skills, and emotional regulation. They are also less likely to develop behavioral problems, substance abuse, or mental health issues.
One example of a real person who was raised by authoritative parents is Barack Obama, the former president of the United States. He credits his mother for instilling in him a sense of curiosity, compassion, and responsibility. He also praises his grandparents for providing him with a stable and loving environment. He once said, “They pushed me constantly to work hard and study hard and make the most of myself.”
Authoritarian Parenting
Authoritarian parents are high on control but low on warmth. They expect their children to follow their rules without question or explanation. They are strict, rigid, and demanding, and they often use threats or punishments to enforce their authority. They show little affection or empathy for their children, and they value obedience over autonomy.
Authoritarian parenting is considered to be the most harmful and detrimental parenting style for children. Research has shown that children raised by authoritarian parents tend to have lower self-esteem, academic achievement, social skills, and emotional regulation. They are also more likely to develop behavioral problems, substance abuse, or mental health issues.
One example of a real person who was raised by authoritarian parents is Adolf Hitler, the dictator of Nazi Germany. He had a violent and abusive father who beat him regularly and a submissive and passive mother who did not protect him. He grew up to be a ruthless and paranoid leader who inflicted unimaginable atrocities on millions of people.
Permissive Parenting
Permissive parents are high on warmth but low on control. They are lenient and indulgent with their children, and they rarely set or enforce any rules or limits. They treat their children as friends or equals, and they avoid conflict or confrontation. They give their children a lot of freedom and choices, but they also provide them with little guidance or structure.
Permissive parenting is considered to be a less effective and beneficial parenting style for children. Research has shown that children raised by permissive parents tend to have lower self-esteem, academic achievement, social skills, and emotional regulation. They are also more likely to develop behavioral problems, substance abuse, or mental health issues.
One example of a real person who was raised by permissive parents is Paris Hilton, the socialite and celebrity. She grew up in a wealthy and privileged family that gave her everything she wanted and never disciplined her. She became famous for her partying and scandalous lifestyle, and she was arrested several times for driving under the influence and drug possession.
Uninvolved Parenting
Uninvolved parents are low on both warmth and control. They are neglectful and indifferent toward their children, and they often fail to meet their basic needs. They are detached, distant, and unresponsive, and they show little interest or involvement in their children’s lives. They leave their children to fend for themselves, and they provide them with no support or guidance.
Uninvolved parenting is considered to be the worst and most damaging parenting style for children. Research has shown that children raised by uninvolved parents tend to have lower self-esteem, academic achievement, social skills, and emotional regulation. They are also more likely to develop behavioral problems, substance abuse, or mental health issues.
One example of a real person who was raised by uninvolved parents is Marilyn Monroe, the iconic actress, and model. She had a traumatic childhood marked by abandonment, abuse, and foster care. She never knew her father, and her mother was mentally unstable and institutionalized. She struggled with depression, addiction, and insecurity throughout her life.
Attachment Parenting
Attachment parenting is a relatively new and controversial parenting style that is based on the attachment theory of psychology. It advocates for a close and nurturing bond between parents and children, especially during the early years of life. It involves practices such as breastfeeding on demand, co-sleeping, baby-wearing, and responding sensitively to the child’s cues and needs.
Attachment parenting is considered to be a positive and beneficial parenting style for children. Research has shown that children raised by attachment parents tend to have higher self-esteem, academic achievement, social skills, and emotional regulation. They are also less likely to develop behavioral problems, substance abuse, or mental health issues.
One example of a real person who follows attachment parenting is Alicia Silverstone, the actress and activist. She is a vocal advocate for natural childbirth, veganism, and environmentalism. She practices attachment parenting with her son Bear Blu, whom she breastfed until he was six years old. She also co-sleeps with him and homeschools him.
Conclusion
Your parenting style can have a profound effect on your child’s life. It can shape their personality, behavior, health, and happiness. It can also influence their relationships with others and themselves. Therefore, it is important to be aware of your parenting style and how it affects your child. You may also want to consider adapting your style to suit your child’s needs and temperament. Remember that there is no one right way to parent, but there are some ways that are better than others.